today

today i did not exercise and instead make a chocolate pie, then ate all the filling that didn't fit into the regular*depth pie shell.
now i don't feel like moving but surprisingly better than i thought. actually, i did exercise, for about two minutes. since my hubby gave me valuable $1,000 advice for which i have yet to receive the bill.
that's why i made the chocolate pie. i hope it's worth a thousand stones to him.

what i did do today: take nine photos of the japanese maple in front of the kitchen window. from the inside. through the window. i only left the house this morning to send off two letters. i walked to the mailbox at the end of our short suburban driveway. and that's how i like it because i'm a house fairy.

i took this about a minute after i saw the morning sun [a rare sight for me] shine through the leaves. that's because it took me a minute to find my camera. 'twas in the bathroom. and why? see last photo of this post.

isn't that a pretty tree? i like the geäst. branches. on the bottom right of the photo you can see our neighbor's lawn with its lack of leaves adornment. realistically, at this time of year, we need not give anyone a description of how to get to our house, were we to have visitors, we'd just say, "the house with leaves in the front." because no one else here does. 't puzzles me. it's so desperate housewives, california [i don't think they live here], appearances, keep up the facade and hide the secrets. it's a shame i don't have a photo of our front yard in germany to show here. would be quite the contrast. on the upside, there are no deep secrets our family harbors that they neighbors don't know about.

that's what it's like in a small town.

unless they're so deep that i don't even know them.

good thing my mom's coming to visit. i'll ask. i'll ease into it with the leaves*story.

"*clearthroat* mama? i'm looking for things to write about on my blog. do we have any family secrets you didn't tell me yet?"

just joking, mom! i wouldn't tell anyone.

and another one. i wondered today, is it possible to spray the whole tree with the painter's equivalent of hairspray so that it will keep those red leaves on all year long?
like what i did to this rose in the backyard?

no, i didn't. back to the tree.

here with a little more sun. a little more orange. and the camelia in the front.

this is where i'm getting close to the perfect picture. i saw the tree, and it looked better than it had all day, and i knew my quest, my day's work, would soon be done. [except for the chocolate pie.]

fee-nee-shd! here, the leaf shadow on the branches, and the red from the picture before, that's it. and as soon as i saw the leaves in this sort of light, i saw pumuckl's hair.

[linked from stuttgart university]

speaking of pumuckl's hair, here's a question i have about my hair.

is there really grey hair or is it the white paint from a recent project? is it both? neither? the first one to comment the right answer will receive a freshly plucked white hair from my head. real or painted, that's the question.

whatever works

i have a big announcement to make.
it's very important, and something i have yet to discuss with anyone at length, except for my hubby. he knows, of course.

of course he knows.
because he's with me every day, sees me all the time, and i have felt the urge to tell him.
wouldn't it be

a hoot

if i, instead of telling people in person, announced it on my this here blog if i were pregnant?

well, i'm not. [thank god.]

my announcement is this:

i am happy.

and i'm not ashamed of it, either. so happy am i, without taking any sort of drugs but coffee, that in the evening, i am happy when i fall asleep. next to my hubby. and i look forward to waking up in the morning.

i am happy when i then wake up in the morning, and look forward to the day. i am happy when i make lunch. when i do laundry. when i cook dinner. i am happy when i buy groceries. i am happy when i knit and sew and paint things. i am happy living with my husband. i am happy that i get to see him every day.

i don't have to leave after two days, we don't live apart anymore. there is no day on the horizon on which i won't be with him.

and that makes me very happy.

of course, there are other contributing factors. there's no war where we live [lucky] and we live in a homey home. furthermore, i don't have to pick up pennies on the sidewalk to afford groceries.

ye who know me also know, of course, that i still do pick up any penny i see.

i also, by the way, pick up paper clips. you never know when you need a paper clip, or have to build a macguyveresque detonation device where a paper clip might come in handy.

so, since the fascinating theme didn't stick [since i just remembered it], i might make the theme of this here blog how wonderful things are. actually, that already is the theme. 'cultivating a happy world around me.'

anything to drive away my many many readers. my entourage. my following. the plebs. commoners, simpletons. [watch whatever works and you won't be offended.] those who don't know the first thing about string theory.

and the most curious thing is: i have been happy like this for months. of course, there might be a day when i don't sing the ode to joy [possibly a happier day for my hubby], but since i stopped popping hormones, those have become less frequent.

in closing, i just have to say:

happy seems to be the default mood.

p.s.: i don't read the news. it's what works for me. da capo.

the biggest household help

[1.49 p.m.]

... that would be coffee.
there i am, sitting at the breakfastnooktable. just finished painting almost the whole $20 secretary from the 'hope for humanity' thrift store, and now i'm ready for a cup of lukewarm coffee. and do... nothing? really? do i find myself in a void of household-tasks-to-do? indeed, it looks that way. floors still look new, in the kitchen and hallway. dishwasher is doing the dishes, meat thawing for my carnivorous husband's dinner [no offense intended, hubby].
but as i have the coffee, as it kicks in, i get up. scrub the sink and wash all the screws and shenanigans that came with the secretary. swipe the countertops and even contemplate finding some laundry to do.
because, that's what coffee does to me.
in german, they call it blind activism. but if you're running a household, activism does not ever need to be blind.

now i sit. look at the screen of my mac -model that comes adorned with white, oil-based primer- and my eyes unfocus. it appears it's time for more coffee. and an apple with almond butter. excuse me while i fill the coffee machine.


[9.52 p.m.]

't looks like we won't put up the christmas tree today after all, since my dear one is already, or still, asleep. and very much deserves some good sleep. yesterday was our second immigration interview, and it just might all have worked out now, after paying $355 and $1090 for a second time each. going in for a second interview and being much more nervous for that. increased-bowel-movement-frequency nervous. because by the time the second interview came, i had been thoroughly scared of the united states citizenship immigration service. so scared that i didn't even, at all, want to write about it here. because i feel that if i do, they will find what i write, and they know me, and i'm never gonna get that greencard.
which i don't even want to take up a scarce for americans-job. i just want to be allowed to stay here with my hubby. without having my status pending. living in some confidence that i'm not in danger to receive a letter with the nice closing words:

"... you are now in this country in violation of the law."

[pack your shit and get the eff out of here]

all that appears to be done. so i can write about it.
but i can only take so much of said topic at a time.
and this much has been exhausted.

what has not been exhausted:

christmas! merry!  only 37 days left. and i am barely starting to get in the mood. i don't know what it is this year. i might have used up my most*wonderful*time*of*the*year energy for the decade last year. christmas started in september 2008. as i think it does, though, start in september. because christmas is my favorite time of year, even more so than my birthday [only because it's not being celebrated for 1+ month], and i think 't deserves more than one month out of twelve.

what you see above is my christmas tree in 2007. picked up from the salvation army. at the start of the season. excuse me, the goodwill. what i saved there, i spent on ornaments. exclusively from crate & barrel. go ahead, zoom in.

of course, i am kidding. exclusively from the dollar tree! that's how i like it. still have them, too. might not have the garlands anymore, i'm not sure. no, i think i do. tomorrow will tell. or this weekend. by thanksgiving, the tree shall be up. not the tree you see up there, though. what happened to it, ye might wonder? let me share.

after christmas, when the ornaments were already taken off but the tree still standing, i decided to paint one wall in my room blue. 'twas a small room, so i moved my bed to the center. no, i think i did that because i stenciled the wall next to the blue one after i was done painting. and then i painted the lampshade, see left. because i still had lots of blue paint. and i really liked the blue. so i decided to paint my bed blue, too. [i'm blue, dabadeedabaday]

unfortunately, in the process of moving around my little room with many things away from the wall, painting, the tree tripped and fell, breaking one leg.

[what impression does the above used grammar give you?]

i donated it back to the goodwill. that's what happened to it.

my blue wall was eventually repainted, green. by the girl who moved in there when i left.

here's another tree. also 2007. i couldn't get enough of christmas then. what happened this year? i assume we're just having a late onset. 'twill happen, though. ho, ho, ho.

i could probably speed it up by starting to wear this jacket. or the red christmas shirt i bought at old navy in july for three dollars. forward-thinking as i am. christmas never surprises me. did i mention i only need about two more presents, and have half of the bounty already wrapped?

to bring us up to the present, christmas*wise, i give the world this here photograph. taken last year. with two people i miss veeeeeery much.

maybe if i just have this printed life-sized, cut them out and put them up next to the tree, like this?
could be like a wall with a hole in it, for your head, where you then fake-pose for a photograph. i could cut out my head and charge people for having their christmas photograph taken with my aunt and cousin.

excuse me while i draft the business proposal.

surprise interview

seeing as i have no readers to alienate, i'm not above answering questions that thousands before me have answered. instead of pondering christine's curious conundrums, such as...
nevermind. i started answering that set of questions. yaawn. must not be so unoriginal, note to self.

let's get cracking on those conundrums. cliches. get cracking might be a cliche. i am deathly allergic to cliches. but then, since i am still sitting here, typing, i suppose 'tis not one.
i do mean deathly allergic.
cliches are symptoms of a bankrupt mind. mark my words. and please, if you find me using a cliche in any post, hold me accountable. for penance i shall post photos of the ensuing allergic shock.

bright idea. i'll answer my own questions. interview myself, if you wish. if i wish. the only other vote in the house at the moment would be the dog's.
give me a moment.
"earl? should i interview myself?"
he gets up, off the couch [the display of interest!], stands there, looking at me.
asks if there's a treat in it for him. i pretend not to have heard. he scratches himself and leaves the stage.
excuse me while i go give him that treat. don't leave! questions you never knew you needed answered shall be.

what do you drink all day, christine?
water. at least half a gallon, often more. recently, coffee. makes me pee even more. dehydrates, so i need more water. a vicious cycle. but no cat biting its tail for i fear my allergy.

what time do you get up?
once at night. the water. then, at seven. recently. i might be establishing a routine. i like routine. i like order. i like to have a system, so long as i'm not at the receiving end of arbitrary decisions made by paragraph riders.

what just beeped?
the macaroons. will go into the oven in five minutes.

isn't it nice to get scientific validation of your own behavior?
why, yes it is! i assume you're referring to what we just heard on the radio the last time we were in the car. that was... saturday. we, the pluralis majestatis, heard that it helps your body in the morning when you drink water. [please ponder the meaning irregardless of grammar.] now, i have always had a strong desire for water in the morning. precisely because i felt dehydrated. and this not after a night of even modestly excessive drinking and/or smoking. nothing of that.
the point, yes, scientifically validated, that's what my behavior is.
as for behaviors of mine the benefit of which is as of yet unknown to human kind, it's just a matter of time before science... for now, of course, ye may ask me.

does it happen frequently, this veering away from the answer to the original question?
it most certainly does. with a mind like mine [in third grade i had one of the biggest head circumferences of my communion class], there is no telling where thoughts may lead. even as far as germany, and back here. this likely because in germany, i suspect a large readership likely to show interest in my life back here, on account of our being related. 'tis one of life's curiosities that at least a handful of people whose blogs -were i aware of their existence- i would read daily, do not so much as type the address of mine into their browser windows. why not, i don't know.
possibly a throwback to highschool, when i knew other people but they didn't know me. is each one of these turkey feathers so busy, so much busier than i, too busy to care?
it baffles me.
and now, the oven is ringing. macaroons demand to melt on my tongue.

i, unposed.

according to my friend victoria, i use the word fascinating a lot.
i find that fascinating. i wasn't aware of it. i think i might just use it a lot when she's around.

i was just reminded of this when i saw the soap with a mole, a piece of artwork i like to keep in the shower. white soap, green mole. which was once its own piece of soap. of course, no piece of soap is wasted with me around.
fascinating. since this blog has no direction other than "it's me", i thought i'd point it to fascinating for a little while.

henceforth i will blog what i find fascinating around here. and even though i don't get out a lot because that's the way i like it, there are many fascinating things around me. paradoxically, i am starting the era of fascinating with photos taken outside of the house.
we were in colorado, one october weekend, looking at houses. i had taken the camera and both hubby and i took photos of what we saw. hubby more so than i did.

now, i shall preface this by saying that normally, photos with me in them are taken by me. often, those photos show me and nothing else. i have folders titled me in 2004, 2005, and so on. i think it ended in 2007. quite possibly because now, i photograph nothing else but me so there's no need to specifically inscribe folders that way.
not quite true.
what i'm saying here: normally i know when my photo is being taken. if i don't, or even if i do, and look different than the self-image i have, i think, "i look like that, too?"

and now before i try out the updated blogger post editor - which might have lurked unseen by me for a while - i shall have an apple with almond butter.
and while i enjoy that apple with ab,  let me entertain you with examples of my sometimes-slow-to-catch-on-ness such as the updated editor, above.
i always knew that the benelux states were those between germany and france. but not until a year or two ago did i find out (and not even through thinking on my own) that it's because of their names. BElgium, NEtherlands, LUXembourg. my brother thomas likes to make fun of me because of this.
and it was not until i endeavored to find out what the "curry plant" looks like that i found out: curry is a mix of spices. and i always thought the fruit, or bark, or any other part of the curry plant was ground up and filled into little containers.
a bit of consolation here: my brother thomas hasn't always known that, either.
still. we're both passionate better-knowers, so when one knows more than the other, big personal triumph. the german species of the better-knower, by the way, is not quite the same thing as the american know-it-all. better-knowers don't know it all. they just know that which you know, better.

apple eaten. with almond butter. worth about 600 kcal, the label tells me. good thing i did find the energy to work out today after all. thank you, coffee.

so here i am. as i accidentally showed up in house photos my hubby took. unposed. uncomposed. uncomposted.

walking innocently. up straight. must have been between one of the many sneezes on that day.

right before i blew my nose.

and then looked at a picture. standing like the a bipedal horse, one leg angewinkelt. my cousin told me that meant the horse was relaxed. to me, it seemed more like it was getting ready to kick me. i do not know how i ever enjoyed horsebackriding, and being around horses. now i find them pretty, but too large to be comfortable around. good thing i live in a suburban area. no animal larger than 160 pounds in our house.  it's an unwritten rule. isn't it, hubby?

can you find me in that picture?

no?

good. just monitoring your mental capacities as applied reading this post.

and that's me pulling up my pants. one for the family album. of which i am the keeper, i suppose, so here it is.

here i am, blowing my nose. mama, can you see this? i did not inward-suction it up. what's the english word for that, anyone?

i remember once when i was little, i did not blow my nose but instead did the inward-suction thing. my stepdad said, "so long as the elevator works, everything's ok." mom disagreed.

i have always found that be a convenient solution, too. but in the past... 10 years, i'd like to think, i have become a disciple of the blowing-it-out method. i am now contemplating changing faith to the neti-pot religion.

my cold included puffy eyes.

the good news: i like myself. so much that i don't mind showing unflattering photos of me to my 1.4 readers.

and now excuse me for i must grate potatoes to fix my husband some latkes.

hours later. latkes made. eaten. with ketchup/applesauce, respectively. comedian harmonists watched. let's return to me, uncomposed.

pensive.

all i see here is the hat.

[credit to Zipfelmützen Film & Entertainment]

and i feel a strong connection to these guys. 

we all wear caps. maybe that's it.
but no making fun of our fashion choices.
or else.

ten grey hairs and a pumpkin

in my world, there is love...

[see the heart shape in the middle?]

... and beauty...

... everywhere.
and sunshine.

as it shines through our front door.
of course, as anyone who knows me knows, where there is sunshine, i am not far. ;)

and what does this picture show you?
that in my world, there is also a well-maintained coif during my year of not cutting my hair. that's right! still haven't cut it and yet, don't i look like fresh from the set of a pantene ad?
the only questions is, would that be an ad for shampoo, or cover-your-roots? today, i have counted nine grey hairs altogether. when i thought there were three. but, i welcome them.
just as much as i welcome my high forehead up there. come to think of it, i don't find it very high. which might be because i'm used to it.

now, i was going to post photos here of my freshly SELFselfself-upholstered [what i mean is, BY MEEEE] chairs. as you can see, read, i am very proud of my accomplishment. and so happy with the chairs. to sit in them is soothing. comforting. safe, happy, comfortable.
what i was saying, i was going to post a photo. i have before and during photos. and i just tried to take a few after photos, for this post, but with the sun leaving us [don't worry, it will be back tomorrow] no light, photo, shows the color of the new fabric as i see it. so, i shall try again in the morning.

for now i shall leave you, my dear readership, the few, with a wish.

happy halloweeeeen!

and whenever i think, type, say this, i think of one of my favorite scenes from ugly betty.
enjoy.

meet the octo-chin

for so many days, i have not posted here. and the world is still turning.
how that happened, i don't know.

a flower in the front yard.

and a little bark.

a tree across the street. worthy of having its shaky picture taken at sundown.

just like the neighbor's palm tree and our backyard. roses on the side, and a cozy golden girls sunset.

but, creeping around the neighborhood dressed up as a shrub to take photos of magic moments wasn't all i did.
i also -after both my hubby and i scraped our legs at the sharp edge of the bed several times- smoothed the edge of our bed. i bought a pocket plane for the occasion. however. once, at home, i remembered the un-handy, big, paint-splattered plane i bought at the drive-in flea market in san luis obispo with brad months ago for five dollars. that's right. that's what i call it, the un-handy, big, paint-splattered plane i bought at the drive-in flea market in san luis obispo with brad months ago for five dollars. in short: tubppibatdfmislowbmaffd. i will refer to it as 'tubppi' from here on.
even though tubppi is missing one handle, and i had to work a little harder at maneuvering him, her, it, not that i know how to correctly maneuver a plane to begin with [thank god there's usually a pilot on the flight], my enthusiasm and excitement at using something i had bought for its looks made up for it.
and it worked!

above you see tubppi and the smoothed edge. i painted the bed black after, so i am very glad of having taken photos of the board's side. isn't it pret-tyy?

please pay no attention to the chipped corner. it's not tubppi's fault.

one of the photos i found on my camera is of a top i sewed:

'twas taken a few months ago. even though lovely, the top is now with the salvation army. or possibly already with a new owneress. the brown part at the top wasn't as stretchy as i thought, or as elastic, or too elastic, so i frequently had to pull it back up when wearing it. adding a strap or two wasn't an option, since it's a strapless top. now someone else's strapless top. i don't have to keep everything i make since i create to learn, too. and there's a photo. what else do i want?
nothing.
i like answering rhetorical questions.
never shall i forget the time i first encountered a rhetorical question. and how clueless i was.
'twas a family reunion. i must have been ten or younger. i would like to flatter myself by telling you that the fine nuances of language, such as rhetorical questions, were part of my conversation skills from age four on, but let's try to stay closer to reality here. i might also have been twelve.
all i remember is that i was sitting at a table, next to my dad. in a room in this big house in lamprecht, with dozens of people present. in comes aunt therese, my great-aunt, and asks into our direction,
"wouldn't christine rather sit with the other children?"
"no, thank you. i like sitting here."
as she left the room, my dad said, "that was a rhetorical question."
ever the advocate for children, my dad didn't even suggest i leave my spot at the adult table. he always took me places with him and never dropped me off at a children's table, or sent me to bed alone because i was a child and "supposed to be in bed." instead, i remember that i once fell asleep at a table in a restaurant, with my arms on the table and my head in my arms. it made me feel safe to always be with my dad.

how do i segue from rhetorical questions to my visit with brad and denise? i don't know.
and that wasn't one.
i spent a lovely weekend in san luis obispo, about three weeks ago. one morning, we went to have breakfast at the madonna inn. something neither of us had done before, despite all having lived there for years. it looks like a casino inside. fantasy world. exceptionally fancy red velvet damask wallpaper.
when we left, we took a photo. were this the year 1989, we would have taken a photo and left.
but, 'tis the year 2009, so of course, we used a digital camera. and of course, we had to look at the photo after we took it. of course, we found things wrong with it. three people in the picture, three opinions on what didn't look right. let me take you on this little journey i shall call "three faces, five photos":

"nah."



"no."



"nnnno."

"getting there."

"this is it!"

if you are now asking yourself the rhetorical question, why would she post a photo of herself with a double chin, for all the world to see?, then worry not, i will answer this rhetorical question for you.
it's because to me, two chins are nothing. no one has said it to my face, but i have heard the phrase "more chins than the chinese phone book."

or is this what they call a turtle neck?
a turkey neck?
excuse me!
i'm a vegetarian!